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Tuesday, June 7, 2011

What is Friends with benefits?

Friends with benefits:
Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
'Friends with benefits' is the term often used to describe two people being in somewhat of a relationship without an official commitment. In other words you’re not officially dating or a couple but you’re having some degree of an intimate relationship (intimate referring to kissing, making-out, sleeping together, etc.).
There are pros and cons to this particular relationship and people undergo it for various reasons.
Being friends with benefits is convenient
Sometimes you may not want to be in a serious relationship because you just got out of one, aren’t ready for one, don’t have the need to settle down or any other reason. This relationship can be acceptable when it’s to the advantage of both parties and is mutually agreed upon. This means if you and your partner both decide you’d just like to be in a 'friends with benefits' relationship either indefinitely or for the now being and it seems to work fine for the both of you then that’s great. The problem comes though when one of the parties would like more out of the relationship (like a serious commitment).
Friends with benefits can be to the benefit of only one person involved
This is where the disadvantages to this type of relationship appear. In some cases one party will choose to be in a “friends with benefits” relationship because it may be convenient to them. Maybe one person is ready to settle down or looking towards a serious commitment but the other person would preffer to stay in this kind of relationship because they get to keep their freedom. They are able to see other people and do their own thing without having to answer to the other person because they’re not officially in a relationship.
Being Friends with benefits can be dangerous
Another disadvantage (whether mutually agreed upon or not) is the fact that looking at the world today with HIV and all other STDs and illnesses (some also transmitted through kissing) it is extremely dangerous to have multiple intimate partners. Mutually agreeing upon being in a nonexclusive relationship is basically giving your approval to be in a relationship where your partner is having relations with other people (and you might be too) which is unhealthy.
By looking at the advantages and disadvantages it is important to decide why you’re considering being in friends with benefits relationship. You need to make sure that it is not only to you or your partners profit but that it positively impacts and affects both of you. Keeping in mind the risks involved (such as the diseases briefly discussed) it is important to set limits for yourself of what would and would not be acceptable in the relationship. Make sure that you won’t regret any decisions you may make

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