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Thursday, August 4, 2011

Signs that your bestfriend wants to be more then friends

There's nothing harder then developing feelings for your best friend and not being sure whether or not he/she feels the same way.
There are many ways of finding out (read up on how to find out if he/she feels the same) but there are also many signs to look out for. Below is a list of signs that you might have missed but which actually say a whole lot about your friends feelings towards you.

Signs that your best friend wants to be more then just friends:
   1.    Jealousy

   This is one of the biggest signs and it is extremely easy to spot if you’re open-minded and observant.

   •       He/she tries to make you jealous

     This will be evident in your friend being more affectionate towards their date or other members of the opposite sex when you’re around.

   He/she may also tell you about their upcoming dates or people who seem to fancy him/her.

      This is usually done in an aim to get your attention or in order to see your re-action in hope that you’ll get jealous and he/she will be able to tell that you have feelings for them.

        Your friend gets jealous

In contrast to the above mentioned form of jealousy your friend may be the one getting jealous of the people you choose to spend time with.

He/she may enquire a lot about the members of the opposite sex which you hang out with or talk about or even the ones you go on dates with.

If you haven’t noticed this yet, try mentioning an upcoming date or a guy/girl who you think has feelings for you and watch your friends’ re-actions closely. First reactions are usually very honest and helpful. Pay close attention and you could know exactly how your friend feels about you.

   2.    Jokes

     According to the 50% rule, 50% of what you say when you’re joking is actually the truth and many use jokes in an aim to hide behind it
     in order to avoid rejection. Keeping this in mind, you will be able to decipher your friends’ feelings by taking more of his/her jokes to heart.

   •        He/she calls you love names

      If your friend is constantly referring to you as husband/ hubby or wife/wifey, boyfriend or girlfriend in a joking or playful kind of way, he or she could actually be making a major hint.
Quite often this will happen in an aim to see your reaction or as wishful thinking. He/she is subconsciously wishing that you were actually with them in that way.

        He/she jokes about you dating or getting married

Him or her saying stuff like “if we were married…”, “we should just get married”, “we act like we dating maybe we should just do it”, “I think if we ever got together we’d be the hottest couple” or anything along those lines is a major hint your way.
This not only shows you an attempt to try and get you to think about things that way and actually consider the thought of you being together but also demonstrates the fact that your friend thinks about things in that light.

    3.    Touching

     Touching is one of the ways of getting really close to someone. It allows you to feel like you’re somehow connecting on a deeper level.
   •        He/she touches you a lot, brushes up on you often or always finds some reason to touch you; you should take not of this.
    •        Cuddling a lot is also a great demonstration of attempted closeness.
4.    How he/she treats you

The way your friend treats you should be a major sign.

        Are you treated like one of the guys (if you’re a girl) or one of the girls (if you’re a guy)? This is not necessarily a good sign. It shows that that might be all your friend views you as. A true friend just like all their same sex friends.

You need him/her to treat you differently.

        Are you treated the same way he/she treats their other opposite sex friends?
This too is not a good sign. Again, what you need is distinct treatment.

Does he/she touch you more or show you more affection then his/her other opposite sex friends? Is he/she less flirtatious towards them? Does he/she spend less time with them?
Look at all these things and consider them.

    5.    Friends and family

        Close friends and family members have a whole lot of insight with regards to your friends’ feelings. It’s thus important to pay attention to the things they say.

   Do they say:

    •        You two make such a good couple
    •        (friends name) can’t stop talking about you
    •        Oh my gosh it’s like (friends name) is obsessed with you or something.
    •        So when are you and (friends name) getting married



6.    Secrets

Trust is one of biggest parts of any relationships. Without trust many relationships fail.
If you have trust already then you’re likely to have a strong basis for moving from friends to more.

        Do you know more about your friend then anyone else does?
        Does he/she tell you secrets that no-one else knows?
        Does he/she show you things (like his/her bedroom when it’s a mess etc) that no-one else sees?
        Have you seen him/her at their worst state (when they wouldn’t let anyone else see them)?
These are all major signs that the feelings between you could be strong and mutual.
7.    He/she’s constantly checking in

      If he/she has deeper feelings for you they might feel oblique to ‘check-in’ occasionally almost as when in a relationship.

    •        Your friend might say something like “I’m gonna be out with the guys/girls from around ten tomorrow night” or “My phone might be off tomorrow because the battery’s giving me problems”, maybe even “Hey if you need me this coming weekend I’ll be at my dads place”.
It’s almost as if he/she feels like you need to constantly know where they are in case you need them.

8.    Music and movies

Music and movies both have the power to demonstrate emotions and feelings very strongly as they commonly address and express feelings, emotions or scenarios that many of us go through.

        By reading deeper into the movies he/she chooses for you to watch together or the music he/she plays whenever you’re around you can sometime interpret that into feelings that he/she wishes t express to you.

        Look at things like twitter teats or Facebook statuses as well. These are also a dead giveaway.

9.    Looking for approval

It might sometimes seem like your friend is constantly looking for your approval when it comes to who he/she goes out on dates with.

        By asking you what you think about them going out with or spending time with a person of the opposite sex they might be trying to get you stop them or see signs of jealousy in you.


   10. He’s very judgmental

   This is similar to jealousy and ultimately linked to it. The difference is that the expressions are a whole lot more noticeable.

   •        He/she might insult the people you choose to go on dates with.

  Look out for him/her saying things like: “oh you mean (dates name) the girl/guy with the big nose / funny feet / weird body.”

   •        He/ she might express negativity towards your relationships or the ones you choose to be with.


 Look out for him/her saying things like: “I don’t think that’s going to work out. (Dates name) is so snobbish and you’re like so free and fun.” Or “Well I wish you all the best but I don’t think (dates name) can ever commit to just one person).

Remember:

Love is full of surprises and is always centred around taking chances. If you don't take your chances and express how you feel you may be left wondering forever.

                                     
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My Book!!! Click on the image to read the first couple of chapters online

My Book!!! Click on the image to read the first couple of chapters online
Shaylee has a secret she's been hiding from everyone... Beneath her brave exterior lies a girl bruised and scarred by life but strong enough to make it through anything. Moral of the story: Sometimes we don't find love because we don't know what to look for.