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Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Hints he won’t miss

Sometimes it’s so much less stressful to hint at something (specifically with regards to guys) then it would be to just come out and say exactly what you want.
The problem comes though, with the fact that most people (especially guys) don’t always get the hints we make. There’s nothing more frustrating that coming up with the perfect hint and having it go right over his head.
falling in love:
Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
That’s why it is always best to make hints that you’re almost 100% sure he won’t miss.

You can go for indirect hints or direct ones. It all depends on how daring you are or your mood at the time. The following hints are with regards to finding out weather or not a guy actually considers you more then a friend and if he's willing to date you or make a commitment.

Indirect Hints

An indirect approach would be to hint subtly. The problem with this is that (as previously mentioned) guys are not always quick on getting hints and often miss signs and hints that are right in their faces. It’s always worth a try though. You really have nothing to lose. If he happens to miss your hints you can keep trying for a bit longer or move to more direct hints (mentioned further on).

·         The best way of carrying out subtle hints is to make them more of a joke. 
·         According to another of my favourite movies “the sweetest thing”, there is a 50% rule with regards to telling jokes. That means 50% of it is a joke but the other 50% is you being serious and hoping that the other person would notice. In other words you make a joke about something in a hinting way that can be interpreted as a joke if you don’t get the answer you want and he can also joke back saying what he really means but would be more nervous to say it in a serious way. 
·         An example of a subtle indirect hint would be to see an old couple and say something like “oh how sweet, that’s so gonna be us one day” and giggle. Even if he just smiles or just laughs about it, it could all lead him to think about it when he’s minds in thinking mode (late at night, at bed time, etc.). Eventually he might just pluck up the courage to ask you out. 
·          Another hint could be to jokingly start calling him ‘husband’ or ‘boyfriend’ just to see his re-action. You should be able to judge from here where his feelings are on the subject. If he looks totally freaked out by the thought then you know exactly that he may never have even considered it (he may start considering it now though after the thoughts in his mind so don’t give up just yet). If he blushes or looks happy o in anyway excited by the idea then you know that he has thought about it or finds the possibility, thought or idea to be something he’d really like doing.
Remember, catching someone off guard and seeing their first re-action is always the best way to see where they stand with regards to something.

Direct hints

·         Direct hints involve getting to the point more openly.
·         You could say something like” So how long does it usually take for you to ask a girl out”?
This would give you an idea of whether or not he actually plans on asking you out. He could say something like “I don’t usually ask girls out” Which would let you know that he might want to be with you but just be nervous about asking you out, or “ I’d usually do it after we’d been hanging out and getting to know each other for at least 2 months…” this would be another clue. If you’ve being hanging out and stuff for 4 months and he still hasn’t done anything it might be a sign that he doesn’t see you as more than a friend.
Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
On the other hand, If you’ve only known each other or been hanging out a month or so then you might have a sign that he’s not the type of guy to rush into relationships and asking him out might result in rejection with him saying something like “I’m not ready for a commitment “or “I don’t want to rush into things”.
·         You could also try saying something like “If there was one girl right now that you would want to date, who would it be”?
This would be your easiest and quickest way to find out. If he does view you as a friend only he might not have a problem in saying “not anyone at the moment” or blurting out some other girls’ name. This would be to your benefit, again protecting you from rejection.
If he says he would date you, however, this is the answer you’re waiting for and you can then either ask him right way example “okay so, how about we make today our official anniversary” or “Is that what you’d really like, coz I’d like to date you too”. You could take another approach though and turn it around on him. In this way you get him to ask you out even though you hinted at it. You can do this by responding “Oh so why don’t you ask me out?” or “so when are you going to ask me out”? Or “So are you gonna ask me out”? That should get things going.
Hinting can be draining especially if it feels like a lot of your attempts go unnoticed. These hints should really do the trick but if they don’t,  If you really want something bad enough and hinting isn’t getting you anywhere then maybe you should resort  being more direct. It’s no good spending half your life beating around the bush if it isn’t going to get you anywhere. Sometimes you just need to take chances and hope for the best.

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