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Wednesday, June 12, 2013

How to get your ex back – Part 1

I want my ex back. How do I get my ex back? How do I make my ex want me again? How can I get back together with my ex? How can I get my exgirlfriend back? How can I get my exboyfriend back for good?
Heart broken:
Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Sometimes you may feel like you made a bad decision. Just one incorrect choice or one thing went wrong and the relationship ended and now you just wish you could try again. Maybe you feel he deserves another chance and that things could work out better this time round.
The important thing is to make sure that you do actually want to get back together with your ex. You need to make sure that it is for the best before you attempt doing it but once you are sure, there should be no holding you back. An important factor to keep in mind is that even if you may feel that your ex has exactly the same feelings for you, you could be wrong. You need to go into the situation genuinely expecting nothing. You need to be able to say to yourself that no matter what comes out of this situation (even if he or she rejects you) that you will be happy or at least content with the outcome and still satisfied with the fact that you at least gave it a shot.
There is no sure way or steps you could follow in order to get your ex back especially since all relationships and all people are different but If you feel that it’s all really worth it, you should make use of the following tips and if your ex feels the same way you do, you could be back on track to a great relationship once again.
Two the fact that there are quite a few effective tips I will list and explain them in a few parts. The first five are as follows:
1.       Don’t let your ex know you’re hurt
Whenever you see them don’t act bitter or upset about the break up. Don’t even bring it up. It may sound weird but the first step is to act like nothing even happened. This is where the point of making a fresh start comes in. You will obviously deal with or discuss whatever caused the breakup at a later stage if you both decide to get back together again but when you see them the last thing they would necessarily want to hear is how depressed you are, that it’s their fault the break-up happened or excuses about what may or may not have happened.
A group of friends having a good time:
Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
If you really want your ex back you’re going to have to put aside confrontations until you’re closer to getting back together.

2.       Be okay without them.
As the saying goes ‘you don’t know how good something is until you lose it’.
At a later stage again (if you decide to get back together) you can tell them you missed them and all of that but to begin with you need to space away from the neediness. Act like you’re having fun or a good time. It will make them want to be with you more. Some guys are also more into something they may feel they can’t have or have to fight for so this could add towards your advantage list.

Going out and spending time with your friends or those who love and care for you in any case is one of the quickest ways to a cure for a broken heart.

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
3.       Bring out the same characteristics your ex loved in you when you met.
If your ex was drawn to or sucked in by bubbly happy-go-lucky personality be that person again as best as you can the next time you see them or bump into them. Don’t let depression or heartache cloud that person you used to be. Be as free and happy as you used to be. There was something in you that made you the ideal partner to your ex. Let them see at least a glimpse of that again. Let them remember how good it made them feel. Let them miss being with that person.

4.       Give them some space after the break-up
If the break up was their decision or they finalized things you need them to have some time to think about everything and they may eventually see that they made a wrong decision (if they feel the same way that you do) and get back to you without you even having to do anything. Calling your ex straight after they’ve decided things might be seen as a big turn off. They may feel that you’re clingy or needy or that you can’t go on with your own life without them holding your hand all through everything. Show them that you can be independent too especially if they decided to end things.
If you the one who officially ended things then it’s still a good option to give the other person some breathing space. Space will be important in this regard because they might need to have sometime not only for thinking or reflecting on the relationship and what went wrong but also to be able to heal after you broke up with them. Emotions can be a big role factor in determining how you re-act to certain situations and they’re still upset about what happened things might not work out all that well.
 If they contact you (hopefully begging for you to take them back or something on those lines) in an attempt to reconcile then again you’re fortunate enough to not have to contact them or do anything like that.
Regardless of who ended things, calling them straight after they’ve decided things might be seen as a big turn off? They may feel that you’re clingy or needy or that you can’t go on with your own life without them holding your hand all through everything. Show them that you can be independent too especially if they decided to end things.

5.       Don’t ever drunk text or call them.
This is the worst thing you could ever do and it would just make them feel that maybe the break up was the best thing to do.
The person that you dated (especially if you were in a long term relationship or spent a large amount of time together) would know you really well. They would know how you react when you’re drunk or sober and how you’re usually speech patterns are. Drunk calling or texting will not be able to go unnoticed.
Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
If you’re trying to get your ex back you want to come across attractive and classy not as a drunkard so please don’t minimize your chances.

Making the decision to try and get your ex back no matter what it takes (including the effort in reading up on it) must mean that they have a special place in your heart. If the connection is real and deep down they feel the same way remember ‘“If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.”

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